Chloë Loses Her Blue Balls, at Least Temporarily

My favorite sport of ball chasing is constantly evolving. Notice that I didn’t try to pawn it off on you as “fetching.” We’re not quite to that stage yet. And after the most recent developments, there’s some possibility that we’ll never get there.

Original blue balls.

Yellow tennis balls were fine to start with, until my friend Lynn gave me two bouncy blue balls for my birthday in February. These balls are bouncier, faster and, best of all, smaller than tennis balls. This allows me to catch them, hold them in mouth, and run with them until I decide to drop them somewhere, which recently has been never. Running after them was fun for a while; then catching them mid-air became a challenge. But then I decided what I REALLY like is how they feel in my mouth when I’m squeezing them in my teeth. Very tasty, and good exercise, too!

Chloë gnaws on blue ball.

Unfortunately, when I start to wear them down and make them softer, those bouncy blue balls start to crack. Then they’re not so bouncy anymore, and if Mike doesn’t notice right away that I’ve broken the ball, I get to keep gnawing at it for a while, and I can break up and ingest darn near the whole thing before he knows what’s up! Mike frowns on this behavior, of course, and after I cracked open three balls in the past week, Mike has put my bouncy blue balls on something he called “Double Secret Probation.” Mike is fed up, I can tell. I’m sure he’s thinking that he paid good money for those balls. But really, what’s the difference between a blue ball and a rawhide bully stick? (Besides the blue poop, that is.) As I see it, here today, gone tomorrow.

A clean split.

Although there are more blue balls in the closet where Mike and Heather keep my dry food supply (They think they’re hiding the food and toys from me in there? Get real.), I think chasing bouncy blue balls on my walks is over for a while. Mike’s been trying to make me chase tennis balls and that beige rubber ball, but they’re not bouncy enough, and I’ve been turning up my nose at them. So I guess we’re at a stalemate, just like the NFL.

I think it won’t be forever, though. I foresee more chasing of bouncy blue balls in my future, sooner or later.

2 responses to “Chloë Loses Her Blue Balls, at Least Temporarily

  1. Pingback: Chloë Tries Out a New Ball and Likes It | Diary of a Wiener Dog

  2. Pingback: Chloë Is Walking to Gnawlins | Diary of a Wiener Dog

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